Wow, I haven't blogged in a while! Things have been crazy busy... aren't they for everyone? So here's what I've been up to. Prepare yourself.. it's a little boring. But then no one ever accused me of having an audacious life! Yet. (I can still hope!)
1. Exercising. Hate doing it, like how I feel afterwards. This is the most consistent I've been in a long while, and it took over my early morning blogging time.
2. Making bread. After years of not doing it regularly... I started again. I love homemade bread (though with the exercise efforts, I shouldn't be eating much of it).
3. Trying to find a hotel room in Salmon, ID. (or something to do while I'm there). Finding a hotel room. Easy. In Salmon, ID. Well now, that's a whole other story.
4. Planning my garden. Square foot gardening is wonderful! Bermuda grass bites though. It's my mission to conquer it once and for all this spring. And I'm already behind. Story of my life.
5. Choosing a new cell phone. This should also be easy. But I get stuck deciding between what I want, what I need, and how much one plan will cost compared to another and researching coverage maps, and reading reviews of various phones, and.... well no one can beat an issue to death like I can. (I envy people who just DECIDE. Fast). I've finally decided. I think.
6. Washing laundry.
7. Reading a great book. "Eat, Pray, Love". I don't love the couple of "choice" words in there... but I bleeped them out and am really enjoying her self discovery through 3 countries. It's a soul feeding book.
8. Getting serious about stepping up to the plate, building my business, and finding myself in the process. The self that I think was voted "most likely to succeed" in high school, then spent the next 25 years not having the self confidence to even start a conversation or the self esteem to think I mattered, isn't the real me. Somewhere in there, I'm confident, fearless, and successful. And I'm getting closer to her every day.
9. Of course, running kids everywhere. It's hard to imagine that will ever end.
10. Staring blankly at a wall for the few minutes in the day that I do have a break... because my brain is fried by then and I feel catatonic.
Showing posts with label success. Show all posts
Showing posts with label success. Show all posts
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Let Them Bloom
I don't believe in the empty vessel theory. You know, that children are just empty vessels and it's our job to fill them up and make them into somebody. They come here as somebody. Those personalities show up early on too. Temperaments, preferences, and attitudes show almost immediately after birth. So why is it some parents believe they can dictate who they are and what they should become?
True, it's our job to teach, train, mentor, inspire, impart, bond, encourage and a host of other things. But not dictate who they are. I feel strongly about this because I have personal experience. My father loved us I know. He was difficult to please though. It seemed that before we were born he knew who we should be....what we should like or dislike, be afraid of or not, excel at, spend time on, etc... So I grew up feeling that I wasn't entirely right. Not the way I was. To be truly loved and approved, I'd need to mold to his image. For me that meant being thinner, less shy, more aggressive, athletic, smarter... less me and more like his idea of me. Overcoming this has taken energy and time that could've been spent more joyfully.
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We hope that our children will share our values and beliefs and be good people, with all the skills necessary to live a long and happy life. We naturally want to share our passions and interests with our children. It's expecting our children to feel as passionately about it as we do that becomes a problem. I've seen parents push their kids to major in a certain field in college and follow a particular career path, even if they have no interest, but in fact a deep passion elsewhere. Why? True success comes where passion and ability meet, finding those things you both excel at and love. Why insist that they do something else because you judge it will make them happier and more successful? I've never understood this.
We give our children all we can. We impart all the wisdom and experience we possibly can. Then we have to give them wings, let them go, and see where it takes them. It may hurt to see them make wrong choices or suffer failure. But we're there to catch them when they fall. Sometimes, they need encouragement to continue a hard road. We have to feel that line between letting them quit something too easily, or walk away because it isn't right for them.
My son Taylor is 15. He started public school this year and joined the Freshman football team, never having played in his life. Not even in our yard. Ever. In fact, he was quite a couch potato. It was HARD. I know he literally thought he'd die at times. He knew he was the least experienced guy on the team. He didn't quit, nor did he mention it. If he had, I would've encouraged him to see it through the season. Dig deep, suck it up, hang in there, and persevere. Because that forms character and strength. Insisting he play football all four years of high school because I want him too is another story. He played the whole season, saw his self esteem grow and his body weight shrink, and really enjoyed it. But he's not sure he wants to play again. He's not really built for football. He has other, competing interests. I admit, I liked saying I had a boy on the team, you know? It was fun going to the games and cheering for him. I will miss it if he doesn't play next year. Really. But this is HIS life. And his decision not to play again, wouldn't be the same as quitting.
I admit, I've had those dreams of what I hoped a particular child would do and be. I'm only human! I know them better than they know themselves sometimes, or at least have a more experienced perspective. I see what I think they'd be good at. Or not good at. But imposing that on them is something I will not do. I might mention it. Suggest it. Give them food for thought. I will never give ultimatums. This is their life. Only they know where they feel truly gifted and happy. If we do our jobs well, or even mostly well, they'll know which road to follow. And they'll bloom splendidly.
most photos courtesy of Alyssa, beautiful children courtesy of me
True, it's our job to teach, train, mentor, inspire, impart, bond, encourage and a host of other things. But not dictate who they are. I feel strongly about this because I have personal experience. My father loved us I know. He was difficult to please though. It seemed that before we were born he knew who we should be....what we should like or dislike, be afraid of or not, excel at, spend time on, etc... So I grew up feeling that I wasn't entirely right. Not the way I was. To be truly loved and approved, I'd need to mold to his image. For me that meant being thinner, less shy, more aggressive, athletic, smarter... less me and more like his idea of me. Overcoming this has taken energy and time that could've been spent more joyfully.
We hope that our children will share our values and beliefs and be good people, with all the skills necessary to live a long and happy life. We naturally want to share our passions and interests with our children. It's expecting our children to feel as passionately about it as we do that becomes a problem. I've seen parents push their kids to major in a certain field in college and follow a particular career path, even if they have no interest, but in fact a deep passion elsewhere. Why? True success comes where passion and ability meet, finding those things you both excel at and love. Why insist that they do something else because you judge it will make them happier and more successful? I've never understood this.
We give our children all we can. We impart all the wisdom and experience we possibly can. Then we have to give them wings, let them go, and see where it takes them. It may hurt to see them make wrong choices or suffer failure. But we're there to catch them when they fall. Sometimes, they need encouragement to continue a hard road. We have to feel that line between letting them quit something too easily, or walk away because it isn't right for them.
My son Taylor is 15. He started public school this year and joined the Freshman football team, never having played in his life. Not even in our yard. Ever. In fact, he was quite a couch potato. It was HARD. I know he literally thought he'd die at times. He knew he was the least experienced guy on the team. He didn't quit, nor did he mention it. If he had, I would've encouraged him to see it through the season. Dig deep, suck it up, hang in there, and persevere. Because that forms character and strength. Insisting he play football all four years of high school because I want him too is another story. He played the whole season, saw his self esteem grow and his body weight shrink, and really enjoyed it. But he's not sure he wants to play again. He's not really built for football. He has other, competing interests. I admit, I liked saying I had a boy on the team, you know? It was fun going to the games and cheering for him. I will miss it if he doesn't play next year. Really. But this is HIS life. And his decision not to play again, wouldn't be the same as quitting.
I admit, I've had those dreams of what I hoped a particular child would do and be. I'm only human! I know them better than they know themselves sometimes, or at least have a more experienced perspective. I see what I think they'd be good at. Or not good at. But imposing that on them is something I will not do. I might mention it. Suggest it. Give them food for thought. I will never give ultimatums. This is their life. Only they know where they feel truly gifted and happy. If we do our jobs well, or even mostly well, they'll know which road to follow. And they'll bloom splendidly.
most photos courtesy of Alyssa, beautiful children courtesy of me
Saturday, February 5, 2011
The Legacy of Strong Women
I posted a while ago about the struggle I'm having concerning what to be when I grow up. I feel torn between the opportunity to build a small business from home. That I already have. But never intended to be in charge of. Yet it's brilliant, and so maybe I should stretch myself. Or then again, I could run with the business idea I've had (forever) that would be totally different and allow me to indulge my creative side, and that is more in my comfort zone. I really felt I had to choose. Why? Well, frankly, I feel I do a poor enough job of juggling a family of 9, home schooling, life in general with the daily fires to put out, volunteer commitments, miles on the road, etc. If I split my focus yet one more way, won't I just break into pieces too tiny to matter? Won't everything I do, if I do too much, just suffer from lack of care?
I'm wondering now if that's wrong. Is there a way to do it all, and do it well? If so, can *I* do it? So here's what got me questioning.
We're studying American History with A History of Us, by Joy Hakim.
Cannot say enough how much we love these books! We're in book 2, "From Colonies to Country" and we came to a story that so impressed and fascinated me about a strong woman. The chapter is titled "The Girl Who Always Did Her Best". Well, that's an understatement! Eliza Pinckney moved with her family from the Carribean to South Carolina when she was 16. Her father almost immediately went off to war and her mother became seriously ill.
She's well noted for her intelligence; speaking three languages, playing instruments, and studying. She also took over all business operations for her father's three large plantations. At 16. She experimented with new crops, growing the first successful indigo in the colonies. She rose up early each day and read for a couple of hours, then took some exercise while checking on the plantations. She studied her music, and reviewed things she was learning (like French and shorthand). At 22 she chose a husband for herself who was 45. She had three children, and then her husband died. So, she ran her three plantations along with her husband's SEVEN. According to history she did this and raised her family outstandingly.
And I can't seem to fit it all in. Yes, life today is different. We have places to be, phone calls to make, meetings to attend, emails to answer... and she undoubtedly had servants to help. But so do we. They're called dishwashers, washing machines, and microwaves. Right?
I'm about ready to read a book to learn a lot more about Abigail Adams. Impressive woman. Wife of John Adams, mother of six children in 10 years, two of whom were buried young. John had long absences from home and Abigail ran home and farm while he was away. Their well preserved letters show a woman who was his intellectual equal (at least), always studying and learning, eloquent in speech, and independent. She made financial decisions and investments while he was away. She was often referred to as "Mrs. President" while he was in the White House because she was so politically active.
I love the passage in Proverbs (31: 10-31) that I hadn't taken much notice of until recently. It describes a good and virtuous woman. Her husband's heart is safe with her. She works willingly with her hands, and brings her food from afar. She rises early, before anyone else, to feed her family. She transacts business, buying a field and planting the vineyard with her own hands. She strengthens herself and sees that what she produces is good. She cares for the needy. Her family is richly and warmly clothed, and she makes and sells extra linen. She speaks with wisdom and kindness and is not idle. There's more if you want to read the whole thing (and more beautifully than my paraphrasing).
To be honest, until recently that would have probably made me a bit... well, defensive. I don't know about you, but I often feel my to-do list and the expectations of others for me are plenty long. As I often tell my family, "I am only one woman". Yet look at what one good woman can do. Think of all the powerful and strong women throughout history. Think of the ones you know today! What have they done? I now see that rather than a list of things to do, that passage in Proverbs simply outlines all that I have the power to be! Good women do much because we CAN.
This week I think we'll have a short home school holiday. Monday and Tuesday off. We haven't really taken any days off, and this woman needs some time to ponder and plan the possibilities. Home and family must be preserved.. yes. Some things in life are more important than others.. true. But if these women could do it, can't I find a way to be more and do more and still be true to myself and my priorities? Am I capable of more than I think I am? Do I have more power than I realize? Life is a choice. It's all a choice. And I have some choices to make.
I'm wondering now if that's wrong. Is there a way to do it all, and do it well? If so, can *I* do it? So here's what got me questioning.
We're studying American History with A History of Us, by Joy Hakim.
 |
| photo from A History of Us |
She's well noted for her intelligence; speaking three languages, playing instruments, and studying. She also took over all business operations for her father's three large plantations. At 16. She experimented with new crops, growing the first successful indigo in the colonies. She rose up early each day and read for a couple of hours, then took some exercise while checking on the plantations. She studied her music, and reviewed things she was learning (like French and shorthand). At 22 she chose a husband for herself who was 45. She had three children, and then her husband died. So, she ran her three plantations along with her husband's SEVEN. According to history she did this and raised her family outstandingly.
And I can't seem to fit it all in. Yes, life today is different. We have places to be, phone calls to make, meetings to attend, emails to answer... and she undoubtedly had servants to help. But so do we. They're called dishwashers, washing machines, and microwaves. Right?
I'm about ready to read a book to learn a lot more about Abigail Adams. Impressive woman. Wife of John Adams, mother of six children in 10 years, two of whom were buried young. John had long absences from home and Abigail ran home and farm while he was away. Their well preserved letters show a woman who was his intellectual equal (at least), always studying and learning, eloquent in speech, and independent. She made financial decisions and investments while he was away. She was often referred to as "Mrs. President" while he was in the White House because she was so politically active.
 |
| photo from A History of Us |
I love the passage in Proverbs (31: 10-31) that I hadn't taken much notice of until recently. It describes a good and virtuous woman. Her husband's heart is safe with her. She works willingly with her hands, and brings her food from afar. She rises early, before anyone else, to feed her family. She transacts business, buying a field and planting the vineyard with her own hands. She strengthens herself and sees that what she produces is good. She cares for the needy. Her family is richly and warmly clothed, and she makes and sells extra linen. She speaks with wisdom and kindness and is not idle. There's more if you want to read the whole thing (and more beautifully than my paraphrasing).
To be honest, until recently that would have probably made me a bit... well, defensive. I don't know about you, but I often feel my to-do list and the expectations of others for me are plenty long. As I often tell my family, "I am only one woman". Yet look at what one good woman can do. Think of all the powerful and strong women throughout history. Think of the ones you know today! What have they done? I now see that rather than a list of things to do, that passage in Proverbs simply outlines all that I have the power to be! Good women do much because we CAN.
This week I think we'll have a short home school holiday. Monday and Tuesday off. We haven't really taken any days off, and this woman needs some time to ponder and plan the possibilities. Home and family must be preserved.. yes. Some things in life are more important than others.. true. But if these women could do it, can't I find a way to be more and do more and still be true to myself and my priorities? Am I capable of more than I think I am? Do I have more power than I realize? Life is a choice. It's all a choice. And I have some choices to make.
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Favorite Websites
I thought I'd post some of my most favorite websites. Some are blogs, some have products for sale, some are just great information or resources. But I LOVE them and wanted to tell you.
Thrift Books is awesome. I have a passion for books (and unfortunately not enough bookshelves... ), but I also don't like parting with my money. Buying used books has been great for our family. We save so much money and often times you can't tell the used from new. There are plenty of used book sites out there like Amazon. But they all charge shipping. Up to $4 per book. Thrift Books charges no shipping and in most cases is significantly cheaper than other sites. They may not have what I need, but it's always where I go first.
Every Day Minerals is one of my newest favorites. I like makeup. It covers my blotchy, rosacea tainted skin. And I love pretty colors! But most makeup doesn't cover my flaws very well, or irritates my skin. About a year ago I started using mineral powder foundation. LOVE IT! However, the store brands have so many fillers that I often found my skin itchy. Some other high end brands are.. well... pricey. Every Day Minerals is awesome. So many choices for any skin undertone. I found it very effective, non-irritating, and magically covering. Her eye shadows have real lasting power and a rainbow of colors. And her prices? Wonderfully affordable. You even get a discount of 20% if you purchase 5 full sized products, which I just did. Don't know which color foundation to choose? She offers free sample kits of 5 shades to try. You only pay $3 shipping.
The Lettered Cottage. My home is horribly "un-designed". It's what you'd call... umm.... we're too poor and busy raising 7 kids to have a definite style. Or time to decorate. Or money to do it. Or the creativity to make it happen... well you get the idea. I know what I like when I see it. I want my home to feel peaceful, simple, clean, inviting and not overly formal. THIS is how I want my house to be. They have stunning before and after photos that give me hope! And while I haven't gotten to all the site content yet, they claim they do this all on little or no budget. Amen. Someday, my house will echo their work. Sigh. Just click on before and after on the menu bar.
The Pioneer Woman. Ree Drummond is my hero. She writes better than me, cooks better than me, does photography better than me, and probably home schools her kids better than me. She's witty, talented, gracious, generous, and frankly honest. Her frequent give aways are fun. I subscribe and get her daily digest in my email in box. When I grow up I want to be Ree Drummond. If you want information on life, children, homeschooling, cooking, design, or a host of other topics, her blogs/website is the place to go.
All Recipes. I'm a cookbook freak. I collect cookbooks like some people collect coins, or shoes. Yet for all the cookbooks I have, there are days I can't find what I need. Or, more to the point, can't remember which cookbook that recipe is in. It's hard getting old. But, All Recipes is a very searchable site with lots of variations to make anyone happy. Recipes can be scaled smaller or bigger, and you can even print off the recipes index card sized and ready to file. Or, you can register for free and file your recipes in your virtual box. Some days, it's a lifesaver (or dinner saver).
Teach With Movies. A friend sent me this link. I don't know about you, but along with entertainment, sometimes I want my kids to actually learn something from the movies we watch... without showing those boring documentaries we saw in school. You know, the ones that for decades seemed to always be narrated by the SAME man. (how is that even possible?). Anyways, you can search for movies by topic. And for a very low yearly rate you can subscribe which opens resources like lesson plans and learning guides for over 300 movies! It's genius.
I hesitate to mention the next one. For a few reasons. One, it's kind of blatant self promotion (not that a blog isn't I guess, right?). Second, it's not like that many people read my blog that it would really benefit me in any way. Third, my mentioning this tends to scare people away as if I will hunt you down and trap you like some stereo-typed version of a used care salesman. Which puzzles me really. Anyone who knows me knows I'm not like that. A lot of people I know don't even know this about me (like I'm a secret agent or something), but I have a telecom and energy services business. Few people know, because I clearly have a lot to learn about being in business! I assure you it's legit. Above board. A lot of fun actually. And my saving grace to not have to go back to work full time (because although I don't begrudge that choice to anyone... it's not one I want to make).
I simply broker services through arrangements with companies like Verizon, AT&T, Sprint, Dishnet, ADT security and other highly well known and reputable companies. It won't cost you a penny more than you already pay for stuff you already use. It makes my desire to stay home with my children a reality. Check out what I have. If you or someone you know is looking to switch or just renew services, PLEASE ask me first or send them my way. I will love you forever and ever. You may even find me at your door with a plate of warm and gooey chocolate chip cookies as a thank you! Think about that. Verizon never did that for you, huh?
Well, these are just a few of my favorite sites and I hope you find something useful on them. Don't hesitate to shout out one of your favorites. It might become one of mine!
Thrift Books is awesome. I have a passion for books (and unfortunately not enough bookshelves... ), but I also don't like parting with my money. Buying used books has been great for our family. We save so much money and often times you can't tell the used from new. There are plenty of used book sites out there like Amazon. But they all charge shipping. Up to $4 per book. Thrift Books charges no shipping and in most cases is significantly cheaper than other sites. They may not have what I need, but it's always where I go first.
Every Day Minerals is one of my newest favorites. I like makeup. It covers my blotchy, rosacea tainted skin. And I love pretty colors! But most makeup doesn't cover my flaws very well, or irritates my skin. About a year ago I started using mineral powder foundation. LOVE IT! However, the store brands have so many fillers that I often found my skin itchy. Some other high end brands are.. well... pricey. Every Day Minerals is awesome. So many choices for any skin undertone. I found it very effective, non-irritating, and magically covering. Her eye shadows have real lasting power and a rainbow of colors. And her prices? Wonderfully affordable. You even get a discount of 20% if you purchase 5 full sized products, which I just did. Don't know which color foundation to choose? She offers free sample kits of 5 shades to try. You only pay $3 shipping.
The Lettered Cottage. My home is horribly "un-designed". It's what you'd call... umm.... we're too poor and busy raising 7 kids to have a definite style. Or time to decorate. Or money to do it. Or the creativity to make it happen... well you get the idea. I know what I like when I see it. I want my home to feel peaceful, simple, clean, inviting and not overly formal. THIS is how I want my house to be. They have stunning before and after photos that give me hope! And while I haven't gotten to all the site content yet, they claim they do this all on little or no budget. Amen. Someday, my house will echo their work. Sigh. Just click on before and after on the menu bar.
The Pioneer Woman. Ree Drummond is my hero. She writes better than me, cooks better than me, does photography better than me, and probably home schools her kids better than me. She's witty, talented, gracious, generous, and frankly honest. Her frequent give aways are fun. I subscribe and get her daily digest in my email in box. When I grow up I want to be Ree Drummond. If you want information on life, children, homeschooling, cooking, design, or a host of other topics, her blogs/website is the place to go.
All Recipes. I'm a cookbook freak. I collect cookbooks like some people collect coins, or shoes. Yet for all the cookbooks I have, there are days I can't find what I need. Or, more to the point, can't remember which cookbook that recipe is in. It's hard getting old. But, All Recipes is a very searchable site with lots of variations to make anyone happy. Recipes can be scaled smaller or bigger, and you can even print off the recipes index card sized and ready to file. Or, you can register for free and file your recipes in your virtual box. Some days, it's a lifesaver (or dinner saver).
Teach With Movies. A friend sent me this link. I don't know about you, but along with entertainment, sometimes I want my kids to actually learn something from the movies we watch... without showing those boring documentaries we saw in school. You know, the ones that for decades seemed to always be narrated by the SAME man. (how is that even possible?). Anyways, you can search for movies by topic. And for a very low yearly rate you can subscribe which opens resources like lesson plans and learning guides for over 300 movies! It's genius.
I hesitate to mention the next one. For a few reasons. One, it's kind of blatant self promotion (not that a blog isn't I guess, right?). Second, it's not like that many people read my blog that it would really benefit me in any way. Third, my mentioning this tends to scare people away as if I will hunt you down and trap you like some stereo-typed version of a used care salesman. Which puzzles me really. Anyone who knows me knows I'm not like that. A lot of people I know don't even know this about me (like I'm a secret agent or something), but I have a telecom and energy services business. Few people know, because I clearly have a lot to learn about being in business! I assure you it's legit. Above board. A lot of fun actually. And my saving grace to not have to go back to work full time (because although I don't begrudge that choice to anyone... it's not one I want to make).
I simply broker services through arrangements with companies like Verizon, AT&T, Sprint, Dishnet, ADT security and other highly well known and reputable companies. It won't cost you a penny more than you already pay for stuff you already use. It makes my desire to stay home with my children a reality. Check out what I have. If you or someone you know is looking to switch or just renew services, PLEASE ask me first or send them my way. I will love you forever and ever. You may even find me at your door with a plate of warm and gooey chocolate chip cookies as a thank you! Think about that. Verizon never did that for you, huh?
Well, these are just a few of my favorite sites and I hope you find something useful on them. Don't hesitate to shout out one of your favorites. It might become one of mine!
Friday, December 17, 2010
The Element
I've found another person to be inspired by. My daughter introduced me to him and his ideas on education through a You Tube video (I love it when my kids start teaching me!). Sir Ken Robinson, PhD has some thought provoking ideas on education. I already believed most of this, but I usually hear this kind of thing from homeschool proponents. His ideas on education are directed towards public education, but anyone involved in education can benefit. He's so brilliant I don't know why I hadn't heard of him before!
Take 10 minutes to watch this and see if you don't find yourself shaking your head in agreement. A lot. The talents of the RSA Animate makes it fun! Then check below for a book review.
Awesome, right? I think instinctively, most of us know this, but the "system" is what we've been raised on. I searched around and found that he's written a book called The Element, How Finding Your Passion Changes Everything. It's not your typical, "follow your bliss" type of book. It's an amazing combination of personal development and education, two of my favorite subjects! It's at once a guide for finding your passions and best self, and a scathing review of our educational system. Color me happy!
He discusses his educational philosophies and how he thinks schools should start over, not just "reform". He discusses the importance of learning in a holistic way, where all the senses, modalities, and "intelligences" are engaged. We know that schools cater mostly to the linguistic and mathematical styles of learning, which leaves so many children feeling lost and sees many reach adulthood without ever having discovered that which they most love and excel at.
Robinson gives many real life examples of people's paths to happiness and success by finding and following their passions. He also shows the difficulties and obstacles that often stand in our way to doing so, specifically in the school systems and societal expectations that so many of us grew up with. As I shared in an earlier post, I'm struggling to find my passion; that Element where I belong. Rather than answers, it's given me more to ponder. In some cases, your Element and what you do to make a living aren't the same thing. You may do what's necessary to survive financially, and immerse yourself in those interests and passions outside of work hours. I'm stubborn though (not a surprise to some of you). I insist there must be a way for those things to meet in my life; passion and income. If only my passions were accounting, or grocery store clerk, or receptionist, you know? Life would be so simple then.
I've realized too, that I may be doing better than the public school system in helping my children discover their true gifts, but I'm failing in many ways too. As a product of that broken system, I of don't often think far enough outside of the educational box. I struggle to maintain enough of a schedule and routine so that I can manage a household of nine and all the grunt work that comes with it and keep my sanity (ok.... keep what's left of it), and still allow the flexibility my children need to indulge their interests and gifts to their fullest extent. With the number of kids, their age differences, and interest differences, I struggle to feel I can meet all their needs in that way. I've got a lot to think about over the holiday break! Watch it, read it, and tell me what you think!
Take 10 minutes to watch this and see if you don't find yourself shaking your head in agreement. A lot. The talents of the RSA Animate makes it fun! Then check below for a book review.
Awesome, right? I think instinctively, most of us know this, but the "system" is what we've been raised on. I searched around and found that he's written a book called The Element, How Finding Your Passion Changes Everything. It's not your typical, "follow your bliss" type of book. It's an amazing combination of personal development and education, two of my favorite subjects! It's at once a guide for finding your passions and best self, and a scathing review of our educational system. Color me happy!
He discusses his educational philosophies and how he thinks schools should start over, not just "reform". He discusses the importance of learning in a holistic way, where all the senses, modalities, and "intelligences" are engaged. We know that schools cater mostly to the linguistic and mathematical styles of learning, which leaves so many children feeling lost and sees many reach adulthood without ever having discovered that which they most love and excel at.
Robinson gives many real life examples of people's paths to happiness and success by finding and following their passions. He also shows the difficulties and obstacles that often stand in our way to doing so, specifically in the school systems and societal expectations that so many of us grew up with. As I shared in an earlier post, I'm struggling to find my passion; that Element where I belong. Rather than answers, it's given me more to ponder. In some cases, your Element and what you do to make a living aren't the same thing. You may do what's necessary to survive financially, and immerse yourself in those interests and passions outside of work hours. I'm stubborn though (not a surprise to some of you). I insist there must be a way for those things to meet in my life; passion and income. If only my passions were accounting, or grocery store clerk, or receptionist, you know? Life would be so simple then.
I've realized too, that I may be doing better than the public school system in helping my children discover their true gifts, but I'm failing in many ways too. As a product of that broken system, I of don't often think far enough outside of the educational box. I struggle to maintain enough of a schedule and routine so that I can manage a household of nine and all the grunt work that comes with it and keep my sanity (ok.... keep what's left of it), and still allow the flexibility my children need to indulge their interests and gifts to their fullest extent. With the number of kids, their age differences, and interest differences, I struggle to feel I can meet all their needs in that way. I've got a lot to think about over the holiday break! Watch it, read it, and tell me what you think!
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Decisions, Decisions
What do you want to be when you grow up? Have you decided yet? I'm 43 years old and still trying to figure it out. I envy those of you who know. I'm totally content to be a full time wife and mother, don't get me wrong. Totally. I LOVE being with my kids and teaching them and helping them grow to be amazing people. I enjoy domestic life. I like cooking. I like making things from scratch. I like finding thrifty alternatives for needs and wants.
I'm not a creative person in the sense of invention or making something unique. I wouldn't call myself a "crafty" person. I usually have to be inspired by someone else with more genius than me to begin. But I've found that creating is necessary for me. Cooking is a creative endeavor for me. I like the pairing of ingredients, the properties and complexities of different spices and flavors. I enjoy "creating" that feeling or atmosphere when I'm playing, or listening to amazing music. I do have some creative hobbies too, like bath and body products, because I was fascinated that not just some big chemical company can do that, and in fact I can do it better in many ways because it's just me. Photography is a new way for me to express and create feelings and images.
I'd probably be content to just appease my creativity through hobbies; except that economics being what they are, and the cost of hobbies being what they are, and the cost of feeding 5 teens/young adults being what THAT is, and the cost of life in general being what it is....... well, I need to get creative in deciding what to be and what to do that could help my family even just a little.
I've learned a lot from a business I've had for the past year. It launched me into my study of personal development and human potential over the last year which has been eye opening and I hope transforming sooner rather than later. I think I'm a different person in many ways because of my experience. I've had to get so far out of my comfort zone I thought I'd die; but I didn't. It's been totally worth it. And now I think I'm at a crossroads. I know the integrity and potential my business has. But before real success comes, I'm going to have to become yet more. I'm at a point in my life where I feel I've spent so much time being and doing what OTHER people want and need me to do, and I truly hate disappointing anyone. I know that part of being a wife, mother, church and community member means giving of oneself, and it's ok because I've received a lot in return. It's just that life's too short to keep putting off doing what you love and what makes you happy. Isn't it?
I guess the BIG question I've been struggling with is:
Do I push myself to do something that's not entirely me, because it's a smart and promising opportunity that's full of potential, knowing I can make myself into anything I want if I want it badly enough (and that it will require growing, stretching, and getting out of my comfort zones.......yet more)? OR, do I choose what I'd love and would make me happy even though it's not at all certain to become anything of consequence (when I really NEED something of consequence and not just more hobby time). Is ignoring the "smart" choice and doing what you love too idealistic and irresponsible? Doesn't it all require stretching, growth, and some risk?
If you've hung in this long, you deserve a gold star! This is a shortened version of my thought processes, because the entire one would leave your head spinning as it does mine (only I'm used to it so I don't get nauseous anymore). I envy people who just know what they want, and go after it without doubt and hesitation. It must be so liberating. I ask too many questions, raise too many doubts, and cast too many shadows.
My hope is that voicing this all "out loud" will bring some clarity of mind so the right choice becomes crystal clear. If you have any wisdom (or even just random opinions) to share, please, just shout it out!
I'm not a creative person in the sense of invention or making something unique. I wouldn't call myself a "crafty" person. I usually have to be inspired by someone else with more genius than me to begin. But I've found that creating is necessary for me. Cooking is a creative endeavor for me. I like the pairing of ingredients, the properties and complexities of different spices and flavors. I enjoy "creating" that feeling or atmosphere when I'm playing, or listening to amazing music. I do have some creative hobbies too, like bath and body products, because I was fascinated that not just some big chemical company can do that, and in fact I can do it better in many ways because it's just me. Photography is a new way for me to express and create feelings and images.
I'd probably be content to just appease my creativity through hobbies; except that economics being what they are, and the cost of hobbies being what they are, and the cost of feeding 5 teens/young adults being what THAT is, and the cost of life in general being what it is....... well, I need to get creative in deciding what to be and what to do that could help my family even just a little.
I've learned a lot from a business I've had for the past year. It launched me into my study of personal development and human potential over the last year which has been eye opening and I hope transforming sooner rather than later. I think I'm a different person in many ways because of my experience. I've had to get so far out of my comfort zone I thought I'd die; but I didn't. It's been totally worth it. And now I think I'm at a crossroads. I know the integrity and potential my business has. But before real success comes, I'm going to have to become yet more. I'm at a point in my life where I feel I've spent so much time being and doing what OTHER people want and need me to do, and I truly hate disappointing anyone. I know that part of being a wife, mother, church and community member means giving of oneself, and it's ok because I've received a lot in return. It's just that life's too short to keep putting off doing what you love and what makes you happy. Isn't it?
I guess the BIG question I've been struggling with is:
Do I push myself to do something that's not entirely me, because it's a smart and promising opportunity that's full of potential, knowing I can make myself into anything I want if I want it badly enough (and that it will require growing, stretching, and getting out of my comfort zones.......yet more)? OR, do I choose what I'd love and would make me happy even though it's not at all certain to become anything of consequence (when I really NEED something of consequence and not just more hobby time). Is ignoring the "smart" choice and doing what you love too idealistic and irresponsible? Doesn't it all require stretching, growth, and some risk?
If you've hung in this long, you deserve a gold star! This is a shortened version of my thought processes, because the entire one would leave your head spinning as it does mine (only I'm used to it so I don't get nauseous anymore). I envy people who just know what they want, and go after it without doubt and hesitation. It must be so liberating. I ask too many questions, raise too many doubts, and cast too many shadows.
My hope is that voicing this all "out loud" will bring some clarity of mind so the right choice becomes crystal clear. If you have any wisdom (or even just random opinions) to share, please, just shout it out!
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Math Appreciation
Can you draw really well? Well, none of us can. We just don't have any gift or talent for it whatsoever. So if I said to my kids that we were going to study art, and at the end of 6 weeks they would have to create a masterpiece painting on canvas..... they would scream and run the other way. It would be too intimidating, right? Any of you non-artists can relate! Yet they very much love learning about art and looking at it. Well, we have a bunch of children in our family who dislike (ok, loathe) math, and think they're terrible at it (they aren't, they just expect perfection and immediate mastery). So, my saying to them, "Let's do these math lessons, then we'll do some worksheets, and after a few weeks we'll do a test (aka masterpiece), well..... they scream, and run the other way. It's too intimidating for people who have an inborn fear of math.
Of course, I want my children to love math and understand it. I find it fascinating, though at times a bit frustrating and challenging. The wonderful thing about homeschooling is how much there is available in the way of choice when approaching learning. We've tried several different math curriculums which I was very pleased with (Math U See with it's great DVDs and manipulatives and Life of Fred with it's quirkiness and humor), but the kids still aren't big fans.
A homeschool coop project I'm helping with inspired me to do some math appreciation with my kids for now, rather than expect the masterpiece. The coop math class only lasts five weeks, but it's so great to see my kids do things with math they wouldn't at home by themselves.
They are more willing to make new rules to old games, experiment, and have fun when working with other kids. They've collaborated really well in sharing ideas and solutions (which would be called cheating in school, but is actually great preparation for real life, don't you think?)
So, I started searching and found some wonderful resources that I hope will change my children's feelings about math along the way as we learn about math from a different angle for a while.
We really enjoy Joy Hakim's "A History of US". (I am aware we're talking about math.... stick with me.) I'm reading it to the second set of children and I love it and so do they! She has such a wonderful way of weaving history into the amazing STORY that it is, rather than a bunch of facts on a timeline. She also does a remarkable job of integrating many topics into that story; economics, religion, ethics, science, art, poetry, etc. So I was really ecstatic when a friend told me she has also started writing "The Story of Science". YES!! ( My kids also think they don't like science much. Silly kids.)
Hakim beautifully weaves a fascinating story and integrates so many subjects, including math! I've been trying to tell my kids that math is simply a language; a foreign language to some of us, but one that the universe is based on. In chapter 2 she quotes Galileo,
"The universe cannot be read until we have learned the language and become familiar with the characters in which it is written. It is written in mathematical language."
Just what I've been trying to explain! Did you know that Einstein gave a lecture at Moscow University in 1955 where he wrote something on a blackboard that has NEVER been erased?
"Physical laws should have mathematical beauty."
When in school did you ever learn about "mathematical beauty"? Einstein seems to have thought it exists. I'm not going to argue with him, we're just going to try a little harder to find it. ALL knowledge is one great whole. I'm learning this on my own educational journey because my experience is from public school which is all very compartmentalized. I found a group of books on Amazon and I ordered one to start with. In "Mathematics Appreciation" by Theoni Pappas he says he, "Introduces you to the fascinating interrelationship between mathematics and other subject areas, the evolution of mathematical thought, and the beauty of mathematics." Right on. He has many many books about math written for all ages. I have a feeling we'll be getting more of them!
I'm determined to help my children appreciate mathematics. They may never be brilliant at it, or truly love computations and that's ok, but I want them to lose their fear of it and understand the beauty of it in our every day lives.
Of course, I want my children to love math and understand it. I find it fascinating, though at times a bit frustrating and challenging. The wonderful thing about homeschooling is how much there is available in the way of choice when approaching learning. We've tried several different math curriculums which I was very pleased with (Math U See with it's great DVDs and manipulatives and Life of Fred with it's quirkiness and humor), but the kids still aren't big fans.
A homeschool coop project I'm helping with inspired me to do some math appreciation with my kids for now, rather than expect the masterpiece. The coop math class only lasts five weeks, but it's so great to see my kids do things with math they wouldn't at home by themselves.
They are more willing to make new rules to old games, experiment, and have fun when working with other kids. They've collaborated really well in sharing ideas and solutions (which would be called cheating in school, but is actually great preparation for real life, don't you think?)
So, I started searching and found some wonderful resources that I hope will change my children's feelings about math along the way as we learn about math from a different angle for a while.
We really enjoy Joy Hakim's "A History of US". (I am aware we're talking about math.... stick with me.) I'm reading it to the second set of children and I love it and so do they! She has such a wonderful way of weaving history into the amazing STORY that it is, rather than a bunch of facts on a timeline. She also does a remarkable job of integrating many topics into that story; economics, religion, ethics, science, art, poetry, etc. So I was really ecstatic when a friend told me she has also started writing "The Story of Science". YES!! ( My kids also think they don't like science much. Silly kids.)
Hakim beautifully weaves a fascinating story and integrates so many subjects, including math! I've been trying to tell my kids that math is simply a language; a foreign language to some of us, but one that the universe is based on. In chapter 2 she quotes Galileo,
"The universe cannot be read until we have learned the language and become familiar with the characters in which it is written. It is written in mathematical language."
Just what I've been trying to explain! Did you know that Einstein gave a lecture at Moscow University in 1955 where he wrote something on a blackboard that has NEVER been erased?
"Physical laws should have mathematical beauty."
When in school did you ever learn about "mathematical beauty"? Einstein seems to have thought it exists. I'm not going to argue with him, we're just going to try a little harder to find it. ALL knowledge is one great whole. I'm learning this on my own educational journey because my experience is from public school which is all very compartmentalized. I found a group of books on Amazon and I ordered one to start with. In "Mathematics Appreciation" by Theoni Pappas he says he, "Introduces you to the fascinating interrelationship between mathematics and other subject areas, the evolution of mathematical thought, and the beauty of mathematics." Right on. He has many many books about math written for all ages. I have a feeling we'll be getting more of them!
I'm determined to help my children appreciate mathematics. They may never be brilliant at it, or truly love computations and that's ok, but I want them to lose their fear of it and understand the beauty of it in our every day lives.
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
By Small and Simple Things......
Do you see this little tree? It's growing from under my front door. Well, until later today when I rip it out before it brings my house down. It started from a little seed as most plants do, and has grown into a little shoot.
Here is a picture of it's older brother (or sister I suppose), that's growing in my front yard. Still small, but growing towards its full potential.
This very tallest tree is an impressive specimen of the same kind, grown up with nourishment, light, and water. It's quite tall now, and spreading its seeds. Literally. EVERYWHERE.
And this is a swath of trees that show the scope in which they have grown, all from little seeds and shoots like the first little guy I showed you. I hate these trees. They're called Tree of Heaven, a SLIGHT misnomer. Imported at one time from Asia and foolishly planted by someone before us on our property, they are exhaustingly invasive. We have been battling them half-heartedly for years, and are on a search and destroy mission this fall.
You're probably wondering what on earth my point is, except to complain about these stupid trees in my yard, or make you feel sorry for me (which hopefully you do). My point is that it reminded me of a very true and important principle that I often lose sight of. By small and simple things, great things will come to pass. These trees are the best physical example of that I could find. The more important examples though, are those of a more spiritual or personal kind. When people band together with small efforts, great things can happen. When we exercise just a few minutes a day, worthwhile changes take place. Reading something positive and enlightening for just a short time each day can greatly add to our depth and breadth of knowledge.
I, who always want instant results to be sure something is successful, need to remember that taking one baby step at a time is often all that's required to reach our goals. I want to be THERE. Instantly. Mission accomplished. Well, sometimes success needs to marinate and develop slowly. Developing skills and capabilities and letting go of bad habits and hurtful baggage can take a while. Sometimes, we deny our own genius and shy away from the great things we could do, because we let fear take hold or we listen to critical voices (even our own). By small and simple things, great things CAN come to pass. I'm going to move forward, one small step and effort at a time, and trust that my reward will be something great.
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Reach for the Stars
Raise your hand if once upon a time you wanted to be a princess... or maybe an astronaut (I wanted to be Samantha on Bewitched and make magic by wiggling my nose... I have control issues.). Maybe you'd be a movie star, or hunt lions on an African safari. Nothing was out of reach! As we got older though, we got the message that dreams and goals needed to be within limits and be realistic. Problem is, sometimes by the time we're adults, we've forgotten how to dream at all. Do you really believe everything is possible anymore? True, I've likely lost my chance to be in the Ice Capades (silly dream for a girl who was too scared to strap on ice skates I know) but there are still dreams worth pursuing!
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You've heard of a bucket list, right? It's a list of all the things you want to do before you "kick the bucket". It's a great way of remembering who we really are under the mounds of dirty laundry and sticky floors and endless to-do lists. Jack Canfield, in his amazing book, The Success Principles (everyone from 10-100 should read it), suggests making a list of 30 things you want to do, 30 things you want to have, and 30 things you want to be.
Be realistic enough to know you'll never be in the NBA now, but otherwise
At first I found it really hard! As a mother, I find I'm often busy focusing on what my kids want to be when they grown up, rather than on anything I might still want to do. I admit I still haven't finished and I kind of put my list aside. Just putting those dreams on paper, gives a little nudge to your subconscious mind and you'll be amazed at how you begin to see the opportunities to make some of those dreams come true!
Here are some of the things on my list. Some are just too embarrassing to share because I'm a dork, but maybe this will inspire you to write your own list. Have your kids begin one, and teach them to reach for the stars. "When you reach for the stars, you may not quite get one, but you won't come up with a handful of mud either." Leo Burnett
1. tour Europe
2. learn to play the cello
3. provide an entire Christmas for a family in need
4. buy a family cabin
5. overcome my fear of rejection
6. find joy in every moment
7. develop unfailing confidence
8. re-landscape my 3 acre "yard"
9. achieve financial success with my business
10. get season tickets to Pacific Northwest Ballet
So...... what's on YOUR bucket list! Click on "comment" and share a couple... you just might inspire someone (including yourself).
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