Thursday, September 30, 2010

Reach for the Stars




Raise your hand if once upon a time you wanted to be a princess...   or maybe an astronaut (I wanted to be Samantha on Bewitched and make magic by wiggling my nose... I have control issues.).  Maybe you'd be a movie star, or hunt lions on an African safari.   Nothing was out of reach!   As we got older though,  we got the message that dreams and goals needed to be within limits and be realistic.  Problem is, sometimes by the time we're adults, we've forgotten how to dream at all.  Do you  really believe everything is possible anymore?  True, I've likely lost my chance to be in the Ice Capades (silly dream for a girl who was too scared to strap on ice skates I know)  but there are still dreams worth pursuing!



You've heard of a bucket list, right?  It's a list of all the things you want to do before you "kick the bucket".  It's a great way of remembering who we really are under the mounds of dirty laundry and sticky floors and endless to-do lists.  Jack Canfield, in his amazing book, The Success Principles (everyone from 10-100 should read it), suggests making a list of 30 things you want to do, 30 things you want to have, and 30 things you want to be.

Be  realistic enough to know you'll never be in the NBA now, but otherwise to  dream BIG.  Don't worry about when or how you'd do these things, just write.  If you keep asking yourself what you really want, you'll be surprised at some of the answers!



At first I found it really hard!  As a mother, I find I'm often busy focusing on what my kids want to be when they grown up, rather than on anything I might still want to do.  I admit I still haven't finished and I kind of put my list aside.  Just putting those dreams on paper, gives a little nudge to your subconscious mind and you'll be amazed at how you begin to see the opportunities to make some of those dreams come true!

Here are some of the things on my list.  Some are just too embarrassing to share because I'm a dork, but maybe this will inspire you to write your own list.  Have your kids begin one, and teach them to reach for the stars.  "When you reach for the stars, you may not quite get one, but you won't come up with a handful of mud either."  Leo Burnett

1.  tour Europe
2.  learn to play the cello
3.  provide an entire Christmas for a family in need
4.  buy a family cabin
5.  overcome my fear of rejection
6.  find joy in every moment
7.  develop unfailing confidence
8.  re-landscape my 3 acre "yard"
9.  achieve financial success with my business
10. get season tickets to Pacific Northwest Ballet


So......   what's on YOUR bucket list!  Click on "comment" and share a couple...  you just might inspire someone (including yourself).




Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Tips For Meal Planning

Alrighty then, I promised some tips for making it a little simpler to have those family dinners. There are a lot of good ideas and plans out there.  I've tried some of them, and have found that everything works for somebody, but not everything works for me. I think you'll find that's pretty much true for you too.   


What these different systems all boil down to is planning.  Some of you just LOVE planning.  And some of you DON'T.  I'm in the LOVE planning group...   and I'm not sure that makes me more sane than the anyone else....   after all you can go a little nuts with planning (and planning can make you a little nuts).  But planning does make it SO much easier to sit down to eat together as a family.  Here are a few ideas from laid back to intense.  Remember, many recipes can be made in a crockpot for those crazy busy days. If you don't have a crockpot, and you are short on time, GET ONE.  Also, it took me 3 years to finally figure out how to set the timer on my oven to turn on and cook while I'm away, but it was so worth it.  


30 DAY PLAN (or for starters, even one week is good)


While listening to a "make 30 meals in one day for the freezer" demonstration, I realized pretty quickly that wasn't going to fly for me.  Making 30 meals in ONE day to put in the freezer so you can have a ready meal is great....  unless you are home schooling 7 kids, one of whom needs your attention or help every minute.  Great idea for someone, but not me.  


The first part  got my attention though.  Before you can make 30 meals in one day, you have to PLAN 30 meals.  I found that just doing that made things run 100% smoother (maybe more).  I pull out a couple of cookbooks (I'm a cookbook junkie...  is there a 12 step program?), ask the kids for any favorite requests, and start making a list.  


Once your list is done, look at your family's month.  Which nights would be easier with a really quick, simple meal?  Which nights will you have more time, and can choose something the kids can help with or that takes more time?  Start plugging in particular menus to particular days. It's totally ok if you end up swapping.  I do this a LOT.   The important thing is to have the plan, then you can shop accordingly for the right ingredients, and be reasonable prepared. 


MEAL THEMES


I've heard how way back when, it's was pretty common to have set menus for certain nights; spaghetti on Monday, meatloaf on Tuesday, etc.  Yeeeaaahhhh....   no.   Let's put a modern twist on that.  If my family ate the same 7 meals over and over again, there'd be some fierce complaining (ok...   I might do most of the complaining...   I enjoy a wide variety of food as anyone who has seen me can attest).   There are  books where they give you the categories and some recipes to go with them  if you have a hard time thinking of 30 things to make. The Food Nanny Rescues Dinner is an excellent resource. 






Themes give you a structure to make the process faster.    I find (rebel that I am) that even that's a bit restrictive if the categories don't work well for my family.  The way it works best is to tailor it to your family's style. 


I'll throw out some possible categories.   Pick the seven that work for you.   Then you choose different recipes each week that fit.  


Pizza                        Pasta                       Vegetarian                    Soup/Stew


Casserole                 Fish/Seafood           Roasts                          Comfort Foods


Ethnic                      Mexican                 Italian                          BBQ night


Burger night            Tofu? (ok, it's a stretch, but someone might do it) 


Clean out the Fridge night (we used to do this, once upon a time.... before 5 teenagers made the idea of leftovers a faint memory).    You can collect  all the leftovers from the week, everyone picks their favorite, then heat 'em up!


These links will take you to a two week menu planner you can print and use (if I figured out how to do this right).  One is blank, and you can use it for whatever themes you want, or no themes, and the other has some basic themes already done.  


blank meal planner
theme meal planner



30 FROZEN MEALS


 Great idea...  just SO didn't work for me.  But, if you think it might be the answer for you, here's a link for 30 Day Gourmet  www.30daygourmet.com.  You plan the menus, buy the ingredients, and spend a good portion of one day cooking the main part of the meals and preparing them for freezing.  Then, you just pull out your "convenience food" and heat it up.   I know some people who swear by it, and it saved their sanity.  

Sunday, September 26, 2010

The Family That Eats Together.....

Want to know a way to teach your kids good manners, keep your family bond strong, ensure that your teens are much less likely to be involved with drugs and alcohol, keep them healthier,  experience less stress as a family, and help your kids get higher test scores and have fewer behavioral problems?  Sounds awesome, right?  Who wouldn't want the secret to all of that?  Here it is...   are you ready?  


 EAT TOGETHER






It's that simple (and difficult).  Eat meals together regularly as a family and those are just 
some of the many benefits that multiple research studies have found will be yours.
September 27th just happens to be National Family Day; a day set aside to remember and practice the importance of eating together (see left sidebar).


I was very lucky to grow up in family where dinners together were the rule.  I can hardly remember a time when that didn't happen.  I wanted to continue that important tradition when I started my own family.  It was easier when they were younger and we didn't run in so many different directions.  Now it takes much more effort and planning.


We probably all have room for improvement in this area somewhere. Do you eat dinner together 4 times a week?  Could you increase  it to 5?  Do you eat dinner together every night?  Good!  How about including a few breakfast meals together?  Do you eat together regularly, but it's harried and stressful and you're eating expensive take home food?   Maybe, you get to 5pm and realize you have NO idea what to make for dinner, and everyone's hungry....  so it's PBJ again, but no one's happy (including you).  As a mother who has a lot of  room for improvement in this area, I'd like to remind myself and all of you  of some simple ways to do this that won't feel overwhelming or impossible.  


1.  Set a schedule


Look at your family's schedule.  Find those days and times that are easiest to make a commitment to eat together.  Examine the not-so-easy days and ponder on how you can still make it work (tips coming soon) and set a time, even if each night it's a different time.  How about weekend breakfast together?


2. Meal planning


                                                                   


The only antidote for  "it's 5pm and I have NO idea what to make" is planning.  Some of us enjoy planning and umm....  some of you don't.  There are lots of meal planning systems out there, but it all boils down to this;  know what you'll be having for dinner in advance, and it all becomes SO much easier.  I prefer planning 2-4 weeks of meals at once.  (I'll have a separate page on this soon.)


3.  Make it fun and include the kids


Pick one night a week when you have the least outside distractions, and make this your FUN night.  Let the kids help plan the menu (in advance of course), and include them in the cooking (it will take a little longer and be a little messier, but you're teaching them to be self-sufficient some day).  


4.  Create a lovely environment








Ideally, I would have music playing each night, put out the best dishes, and make the table truly lovely.  In reality, that just doesn't happen.  But you can choose one night a week (we usually do Sundays), to put out better dishes, light some candles, and make it a little nicer (it doesn't have to be your best china, just forgo the paper).  This also gives a great opportunity to practice table manners!  It's rarely a good idea to have the TV on while eating, but some good music in the background is great!


5.  Enjoy each other!


Take the time to reconnect after a long day.  I can say honesty, that even though I may be home with my kids all day, I can still miss a lot of the finer points of the day.  Depending on the age of your children, think of a few questions (or better yet, ask Dad to handle this) to discuss over dinner.  This can range from how their day went, to current events, to their biggest dreams, or their silliest memories.  Stay in touch with what's important and meaningful to them, and share your feelings also.  The family that eats together, stays together.


I'd love to hear from you!  Do you have a system down to make meals together happen?  Please share...  I'm always up for a good tip.  Is this a challenge for you and you're not sure what to do?  Please leave a comment and maybe we can come up with a solution together.  



















































Saturday, September 25, 2010

Home Schoolers Hiking Flat Top

We're really blessed to be involved with a great home school group!  Yesterday, Natalie joined some other 8-10 year olds to make walking sticks, use their sketch books, and go hiking at Flat Top Park.  Natalie's in pink, by the way.


Chloe came along too.  But she decided to play on the playground instead of hike.  She really wanted her own hiking stick though!  





I know it's too far away to see, because I have a old, not so great camera.  And because that old, not so great camera doesn't zoom so good. And because I'm not that great of a photographer (but I'm working on it!).  But, the kiddos were having a great time hiking.  Natalie said they could see all three rivers from up there....   Yakima, Columbia, and Snake.  Awesome!  She can't wait for next Friday.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

My Life is Like a Bad Country Song

In my introduction, I said that maybe my life would make you feel better about yours.  Well, I think I can deliver on that promise right away.  The last 10 days or so of my life and my family's life has been like a bad country song.  I hate to say that anything that could go wrong, has, because that would only invite life to prove me wrong.  






Here are the major highlights:


Oldest daughter's horse comes down with colic.  A vet is called out, but sadly the horse dies a few days later.......  in the front yard with the younger children watching.  Sad day and $200 bill. 


Same daughter was thrown from different horse the same day the vet came.  It appeared that she had at least broken her collar bone, and could also have a concussion.  So, even though she  has no insurance coverage, off to the walk in clinic we go.  Luckily the collar bone was badly bruised, but not broken, and no concussion.  Another $200 bill.


Husband's car decides it can go on no longer, and a new engine is what it will take to get it up and running again.  $3500.


Minivan, which was pulling double duty as the work vehicle for Ken while his is in the shop......   and still making daily dance class runs needs a crucial repair and spends the weekend in the shop.  $793.


Rental car to help us muddle through for a while....   $170


On the same day the minivan went into the shop,  I turn on a tap in my kitchen to discover that we have not a drop of water flowing.  When life gives you lemons, which it undoubtedly has been, it's helpful to have water in order to make the proverbial lemonade.










  After roughing it in our own home for 4 days without water (SO thankful to great neighbors who let all of us come shower), a crew of friends and professionals came to give us a new water pump, well pump, and all new pipes between said pump and well.......   we don't have the bill yet for the actual amount.  I'm afraid.  


Keeping my sanity through this crazy ten days...........   priceless.  Though I'm not sure I actually did.  







Who Am I?

Call me a dork.  A throw-back.  A nervous tic in the eye of a staunch feminist.  But Ma Ingalls is my hero!  My favorite books growing up were the Little House series.  I read them every summer from 3rd grade til adulthood, and have since read them a few times over to several of my children.  To me, they symbolize the spirit of America and of simplicity and most importantly of womanly empowerment.  That's right, I said womanly empowerment.


I realize these days that it's widely accepted that the best place for women to find empowerment is in fashioning themselves after men, or at least doing their best to fit into a man's world. For many years, women who found fulfillment with home and family were looked down on as less than a complete or successful woman (and maybe they still are).   I think true empowerment is found in the freedom to decide where you fit, what fulfills you, and how you fashion the landscape of your life.


As I read those books, I was fascinated by the idea that individual women used to do for themselves and their families, what had become widely understood and accepted could only be done by large industry.  Soapmaking, growing all your own food, making your own cheese, even your own mattresses (no, I do NOT want to give up my Sealy for a straw tick) came into my awareness.  Women, not industry, used to have the power and skills to do these things.  Now, don't get me wrong.  I very much appreciate modern conveniences!  Take away my cell phone, indoor plumbing, and minivan and I'm a mess (details of this actual nightmare to follow!).  As I write this, I'm sitting in my pajamas in my living room, on my nifty little laptop.  So, I adore modern technology!  That said, I feel we've lost something precious.  


Women had the ultimate power to care for and shape their families long before they thought of putting on their first business suit.    I think it's sad that so many women today have power in their careers, but admit they can't put a meal on the table for their families unless they buy it and bring it home.  Do I advocate that we return to the role of the pioneer woman?  Not exactly, but I choose to find empowerment through fulfilling my role and doing what only a woman can really do well (I know some people will find that a sexist comment!).


 I was very much a meek and complacent child.  Not a spark of rebel in me.  Something about becoming a mother inspired a transformation and lit a small ember of rebellion though.  I began to question "societal wisdom" and realized there were choices I could make each day in how I cared for and raised my famiy that mattered.   To me, that's the true root of empowerment.  Knowing you can question conventional wisdom, find what's best for you and your family, and DO IT.