This is true. But we all do it, don't we? We all believe things, and yet we don't live them. We believe in being kind, yet sometimes we aren't. We believe in being forgiving, but sometimes it's easier said than done. And we all say we want to be better, but then we don't always make the commitment and do the work it takes to actually be better. Of course no one is perfect. But the number of things I believe, and yet don't do is.... uncomfortable.
I'm generally a fairly private person when it comes to personal struggles and issues. My own family rarely knows what goals I'm working on. I know plenty of my shortcomings are obvious, and I guess I don't want to be brutally honest about all of them. It's not out of pride... (okay, maybe it is)... it's just that if I blab about a certain area I'm trying to improve, and I fail, then everyone will know about it instead of just me. Which just deepens the disappointment (or the humiliation)... and the fear of failure, for someone that already has a healthy dose. Please tell me someone out there can relate to that.
But I've been thinking for some time of being brave enough to use this blog to hold myself more accountable by letting everyone in on some part of life I struggle with. I would hope that it would help me stick to my efforts better (and make fewer excuses) so as to not suffer the above mentioned humiliation. And yeah, I know you have so much going on in your own life that you probably don't care whether or not I reach my goals. But as long as it's out there I think I'll work harder (I hope).
The beginning of a new year is as good a time as any, right? Honestly, not a New Year's resolution maker. Resolutions are just wishes. Goals are plans of action. I'd rather set goals. That means deciding what you want, and outlining the steps needed to get there. I've learned to be a great goal setter. But I let the many little fires of everyday life take my focus away from what I decided was truly important to me, and then I make excuses, and then forget, and then I fail. Believing in something and not living it....
So on New Year's day I'll take a deep breath, lay out my biggest challenge, and get started. And if it bores you to tears to follow along, it's perfectly okay. If you don't tell, I'll never know. I hope it'll still give me the kick in the behind I need.
