Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Overdue update

And then I got busy with school.....................



And lost all time to comment on anything.  At the same time, I wish I had more wonderfulness to report. I have done better in taking my afternoon supplements.  I did better with waking up earlier and going to bed earlier.  I haven't had any diet soda, and though I still have some Crystal light type drinks, I make them with double the water now, so less chemicals. But I still need to drink more. Any actual weight loss has been frustrating and full of road blocks. I got sick multiple times at the beginning of the year.  I'd recover, determine to start exercising...   then get sick all over again. 

I have however gotten much more control over my eating portion wise.  This has been a "two steps forward, one step back" routine, but getting better all the time.  I can honestly say over the last month or so I've eaten less each day than in a long time.  And yet, not a pound has left.  By less I mean that before the next meal or snack, my stomach is truly honestly growling. I've had my off days, yes.  But many more on days.  Even on my "off days"....   church party, birthday, etc..   though I ate more than my new slimmed down portions, I still ate less than I would have at an event like that before.  So, frustration is the key word right now.  I had hoped to lose just 5 lbs before my vacation next week.  But no.  A few years ago, I lost 17 lbs just with cutting back portions, but I also found out I was on too much thyroid and as soon as my dose was adjusted....   weight loss over. 

I honestly feel jealous of all those joggers I see on the street (never thought I would say that).  Because I would LOVE to go out and burn off a bunch of fat like that and feel like I had done something amazging for my body.  But I don't think my body could handle it.  It is my biggest obstacle right now.  I think to myself, "I'm going to do yoga tomorrow", then I wake up with this terrible pain in my wrist that does leave for 10 days.  Why?  I wish I knew.  Did I overuse it?  No.  Did I injure it?  No.  It just shows up with no reason, and leaves as suddenly as it came.  Ack!   And I never know when these will attack me. 

So I've come up with a rotating schedule of types of exercise based on how I feel when I wake up.  If my thumb or wrist hurts, then I can walk.  If my hips hurts, then yoga or upper body weights, and so on.  I might just have no other choice but to try and outsmart my body this way and be flexible (gosh I hate being flexible).  I am determined to be healthier and stronger. 

You never know what you've got til it's gone, right?  When my body was stronger, I was too focused on surviving the day with a bunch of kids, or I exercised, but still ate too much so I never saw results.  Now that I've got it all together mentally...  my body has fallen apart. I will not let my frustrations side line me though.  I'll keep finding a way to work around the obstacles. I don't even wish weight loss were easier.  Just that I could DO what I want to be able to do to accomplish it.  

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